Letters From Spain
by Catcateightyeight
Summary: Spain and England haven't spoken in years. When faced with rebellious colonies, Spain begins writing letters to his… old friend. As touchy subjects are addressed the two begin to unravel as their past, and their future, are thrown into question. Rated for colorful usage of language.
1. April 25, 1895

April 25, 1895

Dear England,

Hello old friend. How have you been? I haven't heard anything about you in a long time. Just the other day I started thinking about you again. The last time we saw each other was close to a hundred years ago, and we didn't get much of a chance to talk. I'm honestly not sure why I'm writing you. Perhaps I feel like you would understand what I'm going through.

My colonies are starting to become a little restless again. I remember you had similar troubles once. Cuba, who has been my main concern these past few months, has been threatening to declare independence. Keeping ahold of the guy shouldn't be hard, but I have seen what happens in situations like this. That is, I've seen what happened to you. You were an inspiration to all of us Europeans. Until America left, you were proudly part of Great Britain, where the sun never sets. Although, that was my nick name first. Then America abandoned you and the others followed in his wake. Cuba is now acting the same way your little brother once did just before he left you.

Speaking of your once kid brother, you wouldn't believe who I saw the other day. I happened across America just over the northern border of Cuba. You would be surprised by how much he's grown. The last time we saw him he was only slightly taller than you. Now, I wouldn't be surprised if he were bigger than Russia. I had forgotten how much he resembles you. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but for a moment, when I saw his messy blond hair, I thought he was you and nearly panicked. Then I got a closer look and saw the glasses and blue eyes and knew who he was.

I know what you're probably thinking. Yes, I too have been though this before, but this time feels different. When Venezuela and Paraguay left I was nearly heartbroken. Back then, none of the others seemed too eager to follow. Since communication has become faster and easier the news of Cuba's dissident will be much harder to keep quiet. Now I am worried that the others will join Cuba if he leaves. I don't want to lose everything I worked so hard to obtain.

Anyway, I guess America is really what got me thinking about you. We used to be so close, and now we never speak. That is really a shame. Please write me back. Let me know if you can help me with my colonies. I really don't know what to do, or if I should even be worrying. Then again, with the state my government is in right now, one can never be too careful.

Sincerely yours,

Spain


	2. June 12, 1895

June 12, 1895

Hello Spain,

I got your letter, thank you for writing me. You are always a "pleasure" to hear from. In your letter you expressed worry over your colonies. You were correct in thinking I could help you. The trip down memory lane was quite accurate and I do understand what you are going through.

I should begin by saying that situations like this are time sensitive, as you are well aware. If actions are not taken quickly then you may lose everything, as you worry you might. Now that I have said this I must warn you not to make the same mistake I did. Do not try and pressure any of them into staying. They may be immature, but they are not unintelligent people and they will know if they are being taken advantage of. Balancing these two very important pieces of advice can be what saves your empire. However, that balance is the hardest part, and something I could never achieve. You might think this is impossible, and I would say you are right. After all, I do understand what you are going through.

Yet, none of my advice will matter if you allow one very drastic event to occur. If even one of your colonies slip away you won't be able to prevent the rest from following. Even back when communication was not as fast, such a fate was inevitable. The first colony to leave would be something called a catalyst and will inspire the rest of your colonies to abandon you. I would know, since I understand very well what you are going through.

You say that you saw America again. Thanks for reminding me of that selfish git. I had been trying very hard to pretend he never existed, but at least you prevented me from doing that. Thanks a lot. I'm not even bothered in the slightest that he looks like me. On that note, why did you start to panic when you thought he was me? Do I really intimidate you that badly? I never thought I had ever scared you too badly, especially after everything you put me through.

At least the kid's grown a little bit. Although, I don't believe for a moment he is bigger than Russia. That guy is huge, and I would never want to cross him. Besides, America never had that much potential. Also, "where the sun never sets" was not my only nick name. As I'm sure you've forgotten, I also claimed that "the sun shall never set" on my empire. This implied not only that my empire spans the globe but also that my empire will last forever. Your memory must be failing with your age.

I hope my advice was helpful. After all, I understand what you are going through. Please reconsider writing me back if you require any further assistance. Also, don't bother to say hello to America for me.

Yours truly,

England


	3. June 16, 1895

Authors Note: to my readers, please note that after posting this chapter the rating has increased to Mature. Spain got a little carried away and I don't want be reported for an inappropriate rating.

* * *

June 16, 1895

Dear England,

What took you so long to respond to my letter? I know the international postal service is not nearly as slow as you would likely to believe. I clearly remember writing you almost two months ago and I clearly received your letter only days after the post mark. My memory is not as lacking as you would like to believe.

Oh, and by the way, you advice was not helpful. I already tried your stupid advice. Let me tell you how well that worked out for me.

I am losing everything. Only two months into this damn fiasco and I'm already falling apart. I've practically given up all hope of keeping what I have left of Cuba. All thanks to that brat America, I'm suffering under an international war, one I can barely manage in my current political state. He has been pulling my colonies and provinces out from under me one by one, inch by inch. I didn't even do anything to the hijo de puta and he seems to think he has the right to "liberate the poor sods." He sounds just like you do sometimes.

You, and your letter. Your passive aggressive sarcasm was the last thing I needed this week. Don't try to tell me you weren't being sarcastic, I know you too well for you to pull that on me. Clearly you took offence to my hope in having an understanding friend. Sorry I hurt your delicate feelings. And I know what a catalyst is, I'm not el idiota. Your high maintenance attitude is not something I want to deal with today. Get over yourself.

If you have something to say to me, then just say it. I won't blow you off with a sarcastic letter two months later.

In answer to your question, no, I was never intimidated by you. You are far too small to be much of a threat to anyone. However, we haven't had the best of relationships. There were several times when you beat the crap out of me. I remember, not to fondly, of a time when I first saw you across the channel between you and France. Only a short time later we began battling across the ocean. Seeing America was a shocking reminder of how we first met.

As far as nick names go, I really couldn't care less about your pride in your nick names. Besides, those two phrases mean almost the same thing. I don't understand why you are making such a big deal out of this.

I don't think I need any help from you anymore. Better yet, don't even bother to write me back. Now I'll just go back to getting my ass handed to me by your immature ex-brother. Thanks for nothing.

Spain


	4. June 20, 1895

June 20, 1895

Dear Spain,

Has anyone ever told you that you are an offensive tosser? You have really ticked me off. Are you completely gormless or do you enjoy insulting me?

Of course I was being sarcastic. What possessed you to think I would enjoy writing with you? Last time I saw you I clearly remember telling you to never speak to me again, which is something your flawless memory is clearly forgetting. I am not your friend and have not been your friend in a very long time.

You must be trying very hard to antagonize me. I am not that little. My size didn't matter in 1337 when I started beating France up for 100 years. My size didn't matter as I took the greatest steps towards colonizing the American and African continent. My size didn't matter as I fought against Chinese isolationism in 1839 and 1856, and my size doesn't matter now. I will not stand to have you judge me on my height.

Let me be very clear on something. I do not appreciate being compared to that little brat America. There is no other way I can think of to be clearer about this. Stop telling me about him. Even a twit like you should at least be able to muster up that much self-control.

I am not high maintenance. Did you imply I'm an idiot? I am nothing of the sort, and neither is my advice. Despite my contempt, I still tried to help you a little. You should be more grateful you selfish git. After everything I have done for you in the past I would have at least expected a little more respect.

I beat you up? That's funny, I remember those situations much differently. There were countless times your armada surpassed even my best war ships, yet you complain about me beating you. Try not to be so self centered all the time.

Being correct is very important and should not be thought of lightly. The difference between "where the sun never sets" and "the sun shall never set" is enough to be noticeable. Simplifying these phrases to equate the meanings misconstrue the real sentiment intended. That leads to miscommunications and those create even more of a mess.

I am sick of you trying to tell me what to do and trying to be the bigger person here. Your attitude and your tempter are nothing to be proud of either. Stop acting like you are better than me when you are not. A dago like you is hardly worthy of licking the bottom of my boot.

I have nothing more to say to you.

England


	5. June 24, 1895

June 24, 1895

Dear England,

How dare you be so mean to me? In just one letter you have managed to insult me in almost every way possible. Everything in your letter reflects my exact thoughts about you. You are unintelligent, rude, dictatorial, and strict. Yet you abuse _me_ with some of the most horrific insults you know. I have done nothing to deserve such slander.

I had hoped you might still be a friend to me. After your friendly gesture during the Napoleonic Wars I dared to believe we could once again have the kind of relationship we once had before. My hopes were clearly in vain and I must have misinterpreted your actions during that time. Then again, you were always more concerned for Poland during the Napoleonic Wars than you were with me.

You can't seem to let go of what I helped America do to you in 1775, and your bitterness has caused me unnecessary trouble. I was desperate for a friend. Now I see that I chose the wrong nation.

Your actions must have misled me. Years after the American Revolution you were so kind to me. I figured you had found it within yourself to forgive me for helping America, and you were ready to become friends again. Guess I was wrong. You could never have gotten over your grudge so soon, and I should have known that about you by now.

I can't just stop writing about America at the drop of a hat. He has been the only damn thing on my mind for the past two months. The kid has taken nearly everything from me. In two months he has managed to sink me deeper into this war than I ever intended. The worst part, is he has been a complete pendejo about the whole affair. Just today he pulled of a really low move. As my troops were beginning to withdraw from Las Guásimas he came galloping in, guns ablaze. I slaughtered his troupes and left of my own volition and he danced around claiming that was his own "little victory." Clearly I won the skirmish yet he feels the need to pretend he was the victor.

I'm losing this war, and he knows it.

I've never been more disgusted with another nation in my life. The way he flaunts his victories in my face, and the way he prides himself at my expense. America has been kicking ass and taking names as if this was all a game. As if all the struggle of this practically pointless war are the most fun he's had in years. I have not seen anyone so overjoyed by war in hundreds of year. He repulses me.

Perhaps I'm exaggerating a little. With his half baked plans and low grade technology he still seems to think he can "rescue" Cuba, when he surly cannot. America has become vain since the 12th, when Philippine declared independence. He has no chance in Cuba, but with all the other damages I have taken I am losing hope this war will have a favorable outcome for me. I am feeling insecure and alone.

Yet he has only been half the problem today. When I got home and found your letter my hope got the better of me. After I had read what you sent me I felt more crushed by your ill words then by America's disgusting practices. My day has gone from bad to worse, and that is all due to you.

Pudrete en el infierno,

Spain


	6. July 1, 1895

July 1, 1895

Dear England,

I am so sorry for the letter I sent to you a week prior. My hateful words were poorly spoken and I regret sending you that I had written. I wish to convey my deepest apologies to you and hope to mend the bridge my angry words surly burned. You did not deserve the verbal thrashing I sent through the post and I should not have written you in such a foul mood. I deeply regret being so discourteous.

In this time of stress my temper got the better of my judgment and I lashed out. The strain of this war and the poor attitudes of the nations around me has soured my once good nature, which has been what pains me the most. I have no right to blame you for this detesting time in my life and I should not have done so. By now I should have known you well enough to realize that my words in the first letter may still hurt you. You are also not one to allow insults such as the ones I have so impolitely written to be left without retaliation. This fiery spirit of yours is something I have always admired. I was wrong to try and challenge your ego.

Yet this excuse is inadequate to repair the wrong I have done you. There is nothing that could be written make up for the rude letters I have sent. I beg your forgiveness despite my inadequate attempt at an apology and request you meet me in person so I can truly apologize. Recently I have heard of a coffee shop in Budapest that is said to have excellent beverages. If you would be inclined, we could meet there in a few weeks. Please consider my offer and allow me to properly express my regret for the wrongs I have done you.

Sincerest apologies,

Spain


	7. July 7, 1895

July 7, 1895

Dear Spain,

Your letter has doused my fiery temper, and I will graciously accept your apology. Yet, do not be so hard on yourself. I too know you well, and I expect you are feeling very guilty for more than you need. You are not the only one a fault for the way our written conversation escalated. Please also forgive me for having misled you during any of our past interactions. I would very much like to meet you in a several weeks for I too have heard that particular Hungarian coffee house is excellent. I am free on the weekends, mostly on Sundays, for the next few weeks, write to me again when you have the time. Do not let our meeting interfere with your stressful situation and if you cannot find time do not worry about me. I shall await a time and date of your discretion.

Sincerely,

England


End file.
